My Lifeguard Walks On Water

Something within me craved to see a miracle.I remember praying, God, I want to see you heal someone whether it be physically, emotionally, mentally… I want to see you work. Little did I know, he answered that prayer within time.

A little back story…
I do not trust people, especially guys. It’s taken me years to get remotely close to the people that are closest to me in my life. I have realized that I tend to use the words, “I’m in a relationship” to draw my boundary line. For me, drawing that line keeps me from allowing any guy to get close to me. Im not sure which memory pinpoints this mistrust, but God’s been working on me. With some prayer of what to do, I decided to fast from saying those exact words. God wanted to teach me how to set proper boundaries and how to be friends with a guy. Okay, God, I’ll try.

This month, we taught English, Bible stories, dances, and songs to kids, teens, and university students in Phnom Penh, Cambodia. Let me just say, this had been my favorite month on the race! A week in, and already I felt at home. God started working in me. I started talking to 2 or 3 of the guys that lived in the building where we did ministry. One of them hung around me a lot, and at times I was afraid to let him get close, but I remembered God’s plan to help me out. We talked a lot about God; I even prayed for him a few times. I talked to him about the things that God has been teaching me on the race, and he shared about his life. He also struggles with trust. He didn’t know how to trust that God would take care of everything.

Fast forward a few days, I wanted to find a swimming pool to go to on one of our days. So, I asked him if he knew of any that were good, but inexpensive. He gave us a few options, and we decided on the least expensive. I talked to Jordan, and she talked to the rest of the team about swimming. Saturday morning (our last off day of the month), she and I met up with him in front of his house and headed to Cambodia’s Olympic sized pool! We were all so excited! After a short ride, a good meal, and some laughs, we made it! It was huge! There was even a diving pool! Jordan and I jumped in and swam around right away. Our friend carefully climbed in and swam around in the shallower end. He said he couldn’t swim well, I wasn’t sure what that meant, but I figured I’d find out later. Jordan and I got out, and jumped into the diving pool! It was so scary, yet so exciting! I was facing different fears head on, and that excited me to conquer them. I noticed our friend went back to the other pool, so I joined him while Jordan went to lay out and rest. I decided that I would help him swim. I watched as he swam around a little bit. He really wasn’t that bad. He swam about as good as I did; he just needed to have more confidence that he could do it. I don’t know why, but for some reason, I suggested that we both should swim across the pool together. He said he couldn’t. He was scared. I challenged him, I said, “Come on, I know you can do it. I believe in you. I’ll be right beside you.” He didn’t look like he was going to follow me, so I started swimming and turned around, he was following me. I was so excited! I turned around and swam beside him. He was doing so good! I was so proud I him!! Then I felt a hard tug on my hair. Confused, I said don’t do that. I thought he was being playful. Turned out he wasn’t. He started panicking and pushing down on my shoulders. I told him to calm down and move his arms and legs– I even tried showing him how to tread water. He calmed for a minute, and then he went right back to panic mode. I didn’t know what to do. Somehow we made it to the middle of this giant pool away from any wall. He pushed me under again, this time, he was flailing his arms and legs. I thought, God, what do I do? He’s drowning and I can’t save him. I grabbed his arm pit (the only thing not flailing) and swam right as fast as I could. We were so close, yet so far. I yelled, “Jordan!! I need help!” She ran towards the locker room screaming, “help!” Then I saw her and a man from inside running towards us. I went under again, I couldn’t keep doing this. I was running out of energy. Desperately, I kept paddling towards the wall with him in tow, but I just didn’t have the stamina. Right before the man jumped in, I let go of his hand, he sunk like a rock. I screamed “No!” I knew if I reached for his hand, I would sink too. The man jumped in, and started pulling him up, my friend grabbed my hand, but I pried him off and reached for the wall. I held on for life. I could not move.My legs were numb and exhausted. My arms cramped in pain, but there was no way I was going to let go. I was in shock. I kept thinking, why did I do that? why did I encourage him? How could I let that happen? He dreams were to go to America and work there! I almost ruined his dreams. I cried so hard. Everyone told me to get out and check on him, but I just couldn’t. Jordan got out and stayed by his side, until I had the strength to swim to the ladder and get out myself. They told me he was ok. I got out and sat beside him. All I could do was hold his arm and cry. He got sick, and the rest of the water came pouring out. They moved him to the shade and wrapped him in a towel. I felt so guilty, so awful. All this was my fault. I sat beside him again, and he held my hand and told me that he was ok. I apologized. I didn’t know till that night that he almost died. Jordan said it was awful, and his eyes rolled into the back of his head. She said they had to do CPR. I didn’t know. I wasn’t there. I crying in the pool, oblivious to what had happened after the man came to his rescue. The next day, I couldn’t stop apologizing. My friend repeatedly said, “I’m ok. I’m so strong,” and then he told me what happened to him, “I thought, this is it. It’s my time. Then I yelled, ‘God help me!’ And he did. I saw a man running towards me. Next minute, I was safe. I know that I can trust God. He saved me. This is my greatest testimony.” I was speechless. I remembered thinking about how I could not save him, and God interrupted my thoughts saying, “That’s right. Only I could save him.” Wow. Thank you, God. Thank you for saving my friend’s life. Thank you for restoring his trust. Thank you for giving me this friend. I didn’t know, but I needed his friendship. He was the perfect example of how to trust someone. He trusted me with his life. He trusted that I would be there for him, and when I wasn’t, you were, God.

I realized yesterday (almost a whole week later), that I want to trust God that way. I want to give him my life, my heart, my burdens, my everything, and I want to trust Him wholeheartedly. Miracles happen, even though I didn’t see the process, I saw the result. I now know that God had him. He saved him, and in the process, he also saved me. My faith and trust is now restored in both my Heavenly Father and my ability to make friends with the opposite sex.

Thank you, God for the many ways you have saved me. Thank you, for never giving up on me. Thank you for walking across the water for him and for me.

((Here’s a picture of Jordan, our new friend, and me!))

I can’t wait to see how God moves in his life!